Lessons
by Kachanski
Summary: Soi Fon discovers that you never stop learining, whether it be how to fight, how to vent off emotions, or that some people are not quite what they seem.


**Well, here we are again. I got this idea after reading some UkitakexSoi Fon stories. It seemed a bit strange that they would have feelings for each other as they seem to have nothing in common and barely see each other, but it would make sense that someone like Ukitake would be concerned about Soi Fon's wellbeing. **

**I would be eternally grateful if you could take a small amount of your time to press the pretty green button and give me your opinion on this piece of work.**

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"_You will live only for our lady."_

Strike. Thrust. Parry. Thrust.

"_I will always be by your side to protect you." _

The sword swung in a graceful ark, just as she had been shown, cutting down invisible enemies. Her hair swung wildly as she spun.

"_Liar"_

Soi Fon paused, panting. Her hands gripped the hilt of her sword tightly, shaking slightly at the pressure. It wasn't enough. It still wasn't enough. How would she ever be able to achieve anything if she stayed at this level? Pathetic. Weak. She held back a desperate sob, biting her lip and once again swinging her sword, burying it deeply in a tree.

"That tree must have done something really terrible to deserve that." Someone commented from a little way away.

Soi Fon spun around, horrified that she had allowed someone so close without noticing. Standing by a tree a little way away was the body belonging to the voice. A tall slender man with a long shock of pure white hair tied back loosely, a slight smile tugging at his lips. She straightened and bowed "Ukitake-taicho."

He closed his eyes and waved his hand vaguely "You don't need to be so formal; Ukitake-san will be fine."

Soi Fon's eyes narrowed at the all too familiar comment. "What are you doing here Ukitake-_taicho?_" She asked, putting extra emphasis on his rank. She knew this man, if only as an acquaintance. He had often visited squad two to talk with _her_, and they would sit talking often long into the evening while she knelt forgotten in the corner of the room. Although she knew that he was a captain she had always viewed him, and his friend Kyouraku with a certain measure of scorn. To her they seemed rather idiotic and failed to exhibit the poise and dignity required of those in their position. Ukitake was rarely seen without a smile and would sit and talk with anyone, from another captain to the lowest ranked shinigami in a squad, with absolutely no regard for their status and his idiot friend seemed to do nothing but drink, chase women and sleep. In Soi Fon's opinion captains should be dignified and distant from their subordinates. How else were they supposed to be respected?

Ukitake sighed and rubbed his head, his smile briefly fading. The real reason that he was there was that he and Kyouraku had been concerned about her after the abrupt and inexplicable disappearance of Yoruichi, and having decided that he was the one who she was likely to hold the least contempt for he had been sent in search of her. He couldn't say this though. "I was just taking a walk. It's a lovely evening isn't it?"

Soi Fon snorted and turned to her sword, pulling it roughly from the tree "If you say so." His presence was off-putting. It was too comforting, his voice too gentle and unassuming, too much like _hers. _She couldn't concentrate. She just wanted him to go away, but he gave no sign that he was going to move on. In fact he moved closer to her.

"Would you like to spar and give the poor tree a break?"

For the first time Soi Fon felt uncertain. She had witnessed firsthand Ukitake's illness after he had been struck down by it during a visit, and she had been lead to understand that long periods of exertion worsened his condition. Why therefore, would he offer to spar with her? Was it a subtle insult? His way of saying that she was sufficiently inadequate that he would expend no energy fighting her? Or was it a polite gesture that she was meant to refuse, allowing him to leave with a clear conscience? "No. Thank you." She answered stiffly "I would not like to put you to any trouble."

If he noticed her subtle insult he didn't show it. "Its no trouble" he told her with a smile "How will you improve if you don't test your skills against real people?"

He had her there, and she reluctantly agreed, reasoning that it didn't really matter if she couldn't stand up to him in a fight as he was a captain, however weak he may be.

His expression turned serious as he readied his sword and she approached cautiously. When he made no move she lunged at him, but was parried easily, one handed. She growled and attacked again faster. To her surprise he didn't back up as she expected but stepped to the side, knocking away her sword and prodding his at the opening, slicing some of the material of her clothes.

Soi Fon spun, her long unbraided hair whipping her face and once again attacked, thrusting and swinging over and over, her movements becoming more wild and erratic as he continually parried and blocked, leaving no openings. Slowly the realisation dawned on her that he was barely moving, and he was smiling as he fought. He was patronising her! Purposely going easy on her so that she didn't feel bad. _She_ used to do that too sometimes, laugh and smile as _she_ ducked and dodged Soi Fon's attacks. It had infuriated her. She was so used to not being taken seriously, to being dropped and abandoned due to her inadequacy. She was sick of it.

With an almost feral cry she rushed at him, her sword pointed forwards and swung wildly, gaining some satisfaction from the surprised intake of air she heard as he fell back a couple of steps. His next action however shocked her beyond measure. With one deft movement he swept her feet out from under her and she fell hard onto her back. Almost out of instinct she raised her sword as he leant over her and closed her eyes, only opening them when something wet fell on her cheek. He still leaned over her, but a thin cut ran up his cheek, dripping blood down his chin. He looked relieved "Phew. That was close. If I hadn't been careful that would've gone into my neck, and I don't think even Unohana-taicho could fix that." He smiled at her "Are you all right?"

Soi Fon could only gape. She had cut him. She had cut a captain. Was she in trouble? How could he just smile and ask if she was all right? Slowly, she nodded and he helped her up.

"I'm sorry I was rough with you" he said sheepishly "But you were getting rather worked up. You certainly take your training seriously. I wish all my men were as dedicated."

She sniffed scornfully "There's no point if you're not serious."

He cocked his head to one side "I suppose. But then you can take something too seriously" he said thoughtfully "Even things like love and hate should be taken in moderation, or it can turn onto obsession." His hazel eyes searched her "I thought Yoruichi would have taught you that."

That was it. He had crossed the invisible line by bringing _her_ up. "Don't say that name!" She hissed forcefully and he looked taken aback. "Don't ever speak of her! I hate her!"

Under normal circumstances his impression of a fish would have been very amusing, but she was too busy trying to hold back the torrent of emotions that her mentor and lady's name evoked. "Uh…but…" He seemed rather lost for words.

Soi Fon lowered her head _"I hate her"_ she whispered to herself sadly. She had been abandoned, not even considered worthy of a goodbye. Lies. That was all that _she_ had spouted, manipulative lies; _she_ had never really cared about her. That was what Soi Fon had to tell herself in order to escape the crushing weight of the belief that it was her own inadequacy that drove her beloved lady away.

She jumped as she felt a hand on her shoulder and looked up into understanding hazel eyes level with her own. The sickly captain was crouched in front of her, his expression intent and piercing and she felt as if he was looking into her very soul. She hated that feeling, that sense of vulnerability where it feels as if the person before you knows you far better than you do, where they know all your faults and wrongs… _But they forgive you_.

_The time she broke a __classmate's nose for looking at her funny_

_The time when she was a child that she slipped bitter berry juice into her father's tea, just to see his face._

_The time she plotted to run away, abandon her duty because she was sure that somewhere out there, there was something better._

Desperately she tried to twist out of his grip, to run away, to escape those ancient, wise eyes, so unlike her mistress's feline orbs. Eyes which swallowed her and reprimanded her, but at the same time told her that they understood how she felt. His grip remained firm and held her in place "Hey…it's not your fault." His voice was soft, barely above a whisper "she didn't leave because of you."

Soi Fon could take it no longer and she began to tremble, feeling the long held back tears welling in her eyes. "I don't care why she left" Her voice shook, and she sounded pathetic to her own ears. "Why didn't she take me with her? I would have given my life for her!" Why was she saying this? Why was she pouring her heart out to the man who she had always considered an idiot; the man who she had cautiously looked upon with scorn and contempt all these years?

Without thought Ukitake pulled her into a comforting hug, like a parent would with a distraught child. "I'm sure she knows that, but who knows? She was always unfathomable" He didn't say her name, he kept to the unspoken rule that her name wasn't to be uttered, not wanting to risk cracking the already frail woman anymore.

Nervously she submitted to the comfort being offered, the traitorous tears flowing freely and being soaked up by the others white haori as she buried her face in the soft folds of material. She had never been treated in such a way, never been embraced or comforted. As part of the Fon clan and a member of Yoruichi's personal guard she had always been expected to be strong, to show no weakness, especially as she was a girl. She was a little afraid that if she gave in and allowed herself to be treated in such a way then she might never be able to stop, the tears might flow forever until they both drowned. Part of her screamed to struggle, to pull away in the full knowledge that he would respect her need for distance, but another, larger part just wanted to settle against the gentle warmth and let the tension flow out of her.

After an age she relaxed, still trying to stifle her sobs. When he released her she hurriedly wiped her red eyes, trying to hide her weakness, but he only smiled. "Sometimes it's best to let it out"

She tried to look scornful but failed "I'm not weak."

"Sometimes true strength is the ability to admit how you are feeling, and share it with others." Although she snorted disdainfully, Soi Fon couldn't help but see the truth in his words. How had she ever believed that this man was a fool? She wondered. How did he manage to wear such an unassuming exterior? As if reading her thoughts he murmured "wait till you get into a debate with Kyouraku."

At that moment, at that comment all the tension seemed to flow out of the air, and out of her. The hours of punishing training she had submitted herself to that day came back and she felt her legs give out, but instead of falling she was caught and supported. Gently the sword was pried from her fingers and through the foggy haze of exhaustion she could feel herself moving and she struggled weakly. "Stop struggling" she was ordered. "I'm taking you back to your squad."

"No." she whispered weakly. "I'm fine."

He laughed then. No one in squad two laughed. It was unprofessional. "Hmm" was all he said, and he ignored her for the rest of the journey.

She must have slipped into sleep because the next thing she could remember was opening her eyes and being enveloped in the warmth that only sleep in a bed could offer. She had a vague memory of a figure in the doorway, but it was gone before she could react, and even if she had wanted to she wouldn't have been able to resist the sleep clawing at her consciousness enough to get up.

The next morning, for reasons she couldn't understand she felt better. Her muscles ached and even walking was painful, but she felt better inside, she no longer felt like a bomb set to explode any minute. She felt calmer, and although her opinions hadn't changed she felt grateful to Ukitake for allowing her a reprieve. However, when she went in search of him to thank him for taking her back last night she was turned away. He had been struck ill, his lieutenant, Shiba Kaien explained, and wasn't well enough to see anyone.

However arrogant it may have seemed she allowed herself a small smile at the thought that perhaps it was the sparring match with her that had run him down. That day she also went in search of Kyouraku and made an attempt at engaging him in discussion. She left later that evening utterly dumbstruck. How could someone drink, flirt with their subordinates, and discuss the use of Kido for stealth at the same time?

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**Strange ending, no? I got to a certain point and couldnt think what to do with it!**

**I'm terribly sorry if the brief fight in this is bad, I have been told that I have absolutely no talent for writing fights, but I couldn't imagine it without it.**

**Yet again I will ask you to review, because I'm annoying like that. ^^**


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